The European Directive on Idiom, set to come into force on 1 January, will see many changes in use of language.
- The expression a dime a dozen is to become 83.3 cents per 10 items, due to the current fiscal climate
- Cutbacks also mean that 2011 will be the last year you can go ape shit. From 2012, your only option will be to drift towards lemur snot
- Flogging a dead horse will be replaced with prodding a sick frog
- The phrase until the cows come home is to be seasonally adjusted to until the goats get about half way
- A baker's dozen will only be 4 from 1 Jan 2012.
- A drop in the ocean will become about half the Atlantic with the devaluation of the Eurozone
- Under the new European Directive a pig in a poke will become a gerbil in a sock from 1 January. Thousands of pigs are expected to strike over the loss of jobs. Cats in hats may come out in support