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Horses take over radio station

BREAKING: Reports are coming in that horses have taken over the radio station in the Iriphaphan capital Biriyani. 

They are broadcasting the same message over and over in morse code. Experts tell us the message reads no more with the iron feet, suckers.

Tensions have been mounting in Iriphapha in recent weeks since it emerged that the government had armed its troops only with custard pies and a two types of chocolate trifle. Meanwhile, it appears that the country's horses have somehow got hold of F-22 Raptors, the latest generation of US stealth fighters and a range of armoured vehicles and tanks.

There are unconfirmed reports that many of these advanced weapon systems have been adapted for equine use by mercenary scrap merchants.

The US denied any involvement in the escalating situation.

Sure, we like horses, said US Under-secretary for Equestrianism Jim 'Cowboy' Kana, but we don't want to see them taking over countries in armed uprisings. That's a job for us humans. 

Speaking for the British Government, Foreign Secretary William Vague said he deplored the action of the Iriphaphan horses but there was no point in bolting the stable doors after they had taken over all communications links.

Mrs Tharg of Battersby Thungwack comments: It is about time there was a change of regime in Iriphapha. We shouldn't look a gift-coup in the mouth. 

Tom Gulltrunk of Delia Sidings says: I'm not surprised the government is in trouble. They've been flogging a dead trifle for years. 

Mr Fracking of Balcombe Worries says: You can take a horse to a radio station but you can't make it drink. 

We'll bring you more on this story as soon as we have it. IJN Chief Foreign Correspondent John Simpers is on his way to Biriyani and hopes to get the latest straight from the horse's mouth.

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